Monday, November 18, 2013

An Expert

I've found almost everything ever written about love to be true. Shakespeare said "Journeys end in lovers meeting." What an extraordinary thought. Personally, I have not experienced anything remotely close to that, but I am more than willing to believe Shakespeare had. I suppose I think about love more than anyone really should. I am constantly amazed by its sheer power to alter and define our lives.
It was Shakespeare who also said "love is blind". Now that is something I know to be true. For some quite inexplicably, love fades; for others love is simply lost. But then of course love can also be found, even if just for the night.
And then, there's another kind of love: the cruelest kind. The one that almost kills its victims. Its called unrequited love. Of that I am an expert. Most love stories are about people who fall in love with each other. But what about the rest of us? What about our stories, those of us who fall in love alone?
We are the victims of the one sided affair. We are the cursed of the loved ones. We are the unloved ones, the walking wounded. The handicapped without the advantage of a great parking space! Yes, you are looking at one such individual. And I have willingly loved that man for over three miserable years! The absolute worst years of my life! The worst Christmas', the worst Birthday's, New Years Eve's brought in by tears and valium. These years that I have been in love have been the darkest days of my life. All because I've been cursed by being in love with a man who does not and will not love me back. Oh god, just the sight of him! Heart pounding! Throat thickening! Absolutely can't swallow! All the usual symptoms.
Iris - The Holiday

Monday, November 04, 2013

Goodbye, you one dreadful month

I actually don't have any ideas to start this post with but I still have the urge to make a post in this new month. October was a dreadful month. I was sick and that time I thought I will die soon. I went to doctor for medical check-up. People in Pasar 7 clinic said I'm positive DBD (mind you, idk what it called) and typhus.  Doctor in Elisabeth Hospital said I'm negative those deadly shit. Doctor in Madani Clinic said I got dyspepsia, which is kind of true. I diagnosed myself, I got GERD (amit-amit). After a lot of tears, here I am. I'm back to uni, even my condition isn't that normal as before. I thanked God for His blessing in every step I took.

Mid-term is in the air (try not to breath lol). I supposed to study right now seeing advanced accounting is still waving on the gate for me. I'm still studying for StatPel and look how messy my desktop is.

Well, wish me best luck for the rest of my subjects. I also need a strength because you know, I'm not in that good condition. Still I'm sure God will give me a recovery.