Reflection

Sometimes I wish I were an angel so I couldn't have to feel this feelings. Worries, sadness, happiness, guilty, and so on.

I was miserable! How was it seeing all your friends moving forward and you're the only one who stay behind? That was the thing that made me so sensitive these past two weeks. I tried, I cried, I prayed but things weren't go so well. I told to myself I should be happy but every single damn time I did that, I just got more envy and angrier than the last time.

I shut happiness out of my life. Gosh, even laughing feels like a scarcest thing in this dirty and fucked up world. Until one time, when I was beyond all strength, I realized that I was so selfish, so evil. My pride had turned me into a foul girl. I was so arrogant, I was happy when other people sad, I was so full of myself, and I always thought the bad things. I was pure evil and I... I was so ashamed of my pitiful self.

I couldn't take it any longer. I think I have a serious mental problem.