Reflection

Sometimes I wish I were an angel so I couldn't have to feel this feelings. Worries, sadness, happiness, guilty, and so on.

I was miserable! How was it seeing all your friends moving forward and you're the only one who stay behind? That was the thing that made me so sensitive these past two weeks. I tried, I cried, I prayed but things weren't go so well. I told to myself I should be happy but every single damn time I did that, I just got more envy and angrier than the last time.

I shut happiness out of my life. Gosh, even laughing feels like a scarcest thing in this dirty and fucked up world. Until one time, when I was beyond all strength, I realized that I was so selfish, so evil. My pride had turned me into a foul girl. I was so arrogant, I was happy when other people sad, I was so full of myself, and I always thought the bad things. I was pure evil and I... I was so ashamed of my pitiful self.

I couldn't take it any longer. I think I have a serious mental problem.

How Is It

that every time you wake up, you know that you are a filthy scum in the entire world?

You,

I'm not so nice so I don't know how to say this. I hope you understand what my silence means. I hurt you a hundred times. Will you just let me free?

I don't want to feel any guilt every single damn time I ignore your affection. I always thought that someday you'll find an answer in my silence. But, God, you just don't get it. It's undeniably frustrating.

Please... leave me be. There are plenty of woman better than me. I'm not what you are think of. I'm spoiled. Tainted. Broken. I do not love.

Please... your love makes both of us suffer. Just stop loving me. I don't hate you. I just don't want you keep wasting your time on me. I don't want you to be like me.

Please... go away, look ahead in your amazing life and just observe all good things still waiting.

Sincerely,

The guilt ones

Ego

Don't leave for

I already missing you

 

Instant

boys and girls
wandering the corridor of life
some with the crowds
some with the olds

doing what their old people asked
with one goal on their forehead
forgetting the process
little do they know they
only build the laziness

label is their middle name
visiting whats cool in town
light make up, glamour gown
looking at people, down
little do they know
they're look like a clown

when the time comes for
boys and girls to live
on their own
they use the power of
their old people

living in a circle
this generation is cliche

But Them

Everything is the same
We are living under
The same sky
Standing on the
Same ground
Breathing in the
Same air

We are living
In the same space
Running the same pace
Having the same taste

Everything is the same
Even the feelings
Their words hurt us
Yet neither of them know

We hurt inside
You hurt me
She hurts you
Yet neither of them know

Everything is the same
But the people we
Shared our hearts with